ANNA CONDA Monarch of
the Man-Whores
NAME: Unknown
HAIR: Zero
EYES: Green HEIGHT:
5’ 8
DISPOSITION: Scandinavian
OCCUPATION: She-pimp
Anna Conda originally
hails from Norway, as does her selection of overly muscled, leather-clad
bodyguards. Anna feels she is the queen of female pimps and this is true,
largely because she is one of the only female pimps anywhere. There’s a few on
the West Coast, a couple in England, a really mean one in the Congo and four in
a trailer park in Florida (all half-sisters no less), but none can hold a
candle to the quality of Anna Conda’s prostitutes. She takes pride in hunting
them down herself, often targeting Boy Scout groups because “they travel in
herds.” Anna’s words, not mine.
LIKES: Roving packs of
naïve adolescent males.
DISLIKES: Body hair. She
hates all body hair. Those eyebrows of hers are tattoos.
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